Isn't it abusive, though? When you say no, it means no!
The only difference between an abusive relationship and my
relationship? Consent. I consented to be abused, emotionally and
physically. He doesn't do it emotionally, though, but the point is that
he could. Physically, I love bruises and pain. I am loving it
more and more. The word 'no' doesn't exist in our relationship. Yes, I
say it, and I may mean it, but I consented to him making me say yes.
The good thing about this, is that I am allowed to say no when I have a good reason.
What do you mean allowed? You have your own mind, use it!
I am allowed
to say no, to state my opinions, to sometimes even get my way. It is at
his discretion. He can take away everything. I may resent him for it,
but in the end, I love that he as all the authority. All. I gave myself
to him - body, mind, and possessions. What is mine is his, and what is
his, is his.
Why don't you just do it? Why ask?
biggest 'symbol' of our relationship (besides the collar) is asking for
everything. I have been getting used to asking for things.
"Master, may I have some chocolate?"
"Master, may I put some clothes on?"
"Can I have a kiss, Master?"
"May I use the computer, Master?"
"What would you like for dinner?"
"Am I cooking tonight?"
I have also begun to use these questions in public.
"Master" - such and old word.
went through some phases. First it was Sir, then it was Master, when we
decided that we would try a complete Power Transfer. It has worked
amazingly for us - our relationship is so much better. With his rules of
being honest and transparent, my communication skills has improved, and
still is improving in a good way.
I have gotten used to using "Master" in other instances beside his use of my 'slave' name. (which is simple Cherie)
took a while to not feel guilty about liking these things. I am still
trying to accept that I 'serve a man'. Growing up, seeing my mother
(non-consensually) being forced to do things, I told myself I would
never be below a man.
And, look, here I am. We are equal in the
fact we are human brings. The unequality comes to authority. That is the
point of this relationship. Although some M/s relationships have
nothing to do with love, it has everything to do with authority. Mine
does have ';love' in it, but I feel it has more 'security' than any
other relationship I've had.