Wednesday, April 11, 2012

My Head

I just explained this to Master, and I think it's a good way to explain my head.

When I am feeling healthy, good, etc, my head is white, calm, and if anything bad comes in, I tend to analyze it, and put it through a certain white door, to put it in a safe place and learn from it.

When I am feeling depressed, bad, and uncontrolled, my head turns into a rainbow of colors, actions, and sounds. All over the place. If something bad comes in, it stays, gets crowded, and never leaves.

My senses feel overloaded.

The rainbow in my head is how I feel now.


  1. Ah-ha. Makes sense now. This is probably why you shocked me by leaving a rude comment on my blog today. Feel better soon..depression and "rainbow brain" doesn't suit you. Like, at all.


    1. I meant what I said, but it definitely could have been said in a different way. I apologize, Melody.

    2. Oh, hell. Sigh. I'm sorry, too. I had a knee-jerk reaction to your comment, because, honestly, it hurt. Working in the legal field is what I went to college for, and what I want to do. I have a passion for it, deep inside. I want to help people, in that way. And I've gone to so many interviews now, only to be told I'm not good enough and sent right back out the door. So when you told me I wasn't the right fit, it stung, and just made me feel even worse about myself. Your not the only one who's been struggling with depression.
      Still, regardless of how your comment made me feel, I didn't have to come back and leave some bitchy comment about your depression and the way you've been feeling lately. It wasn't called for. I hope you can accept my apology as well. Let's just be depressed together :D
      That sounds like more fun, anyways.


  2. I am so sorry that you feel this way. Yes, I know it's not fun at all. But I know that you will be able to get through this. Keep talking to your master because he will always be there for you.

    Best wishes,
    Kitten's Master